Hey there! I’m Jen
And I am so happy you are here
As you will see I wear many hats. I’m a life and success coach, supervisor/engineer, business owner, wife and mom of four super silly kiddos (including Carter, my 11 year old step son, Stella (3) and twins Jack and Ellis (14 months). I help high performing moms reduce stress and create a fulfilling life where they can HAVE it all (family + career + happiness). To say the least, I am just a tad bit busy just like you!
Some say I have it all figured out. But let me tell you, it has not always been that way especially when it came to stress As a lifetime overachiever, in 2009 I was told I had anxiety. Maybe, ignorance was bliss. But truly putting words to HOW I felt, actually made it worse. Growing up, I was told I wasn’t perfect, but I was close. My mom was the main influence in my life. While my dad was around, he focused on providing for our family, not connection with his family. Struggling with his own issues, the tumultuous relationship with my dad, over time left an imprint that I wouldn’t understand until I was an adult. I struggled with healthy relationships with men because I had never seen a stable loving man in my father.
I grew up in a small coal mining town in Kentucky. Current population is still about 800 people. It was more common for girls to get pregnant in high school than for them to go to college. No one in my family went to college and my mom was determined for me to have the things in life she didn’t. It was a great motivator to have someone push me from a very young age. It also came with high expectations. I never wanted to let my parents down. I knew A’s were the only thing acceptable in my home. My mom was very involved in creating a plan for me that would ensure I went to college. I look back and truly thank her for where I am today. She shaped me in so many ways, even though she was trying to figure it out right along with me. I was in every science fair, 4-H competition, piano lessons, private school and the leader of every club. I had to be the BEST at everything. Sometimes I was. Sometimes I wasn’t. I didn’t know how to manage the emotion of not feeling good enough while also being praised by most people in my life for doing so well. My parents even moved to Titusville, Florida so I could pursue my dream of working at NASA.
So I continued doing what I KNEW. I worked harder and harder. A 4.1 GPA in high school. President of National Honor Society. A NASA internship at 16. A full-time NASA internship at 18. Scholarships to the University of Florida. A Bachelor’s and Master in Environmental Engineering. By 27 a technical lead at NASA and Supervisor by 31.
But deep down, I didn’t LOVE MYSELF unless I was accomplishing something.
It was a combination of counseling and coaching that enabled me to heal and also TAKE my POWER back. To realize MY SELF WORTH without the approval of anyone else.
For me, power is being aware of my feelings and being OK enough to sit with them. Girl, this was HARD. I would get anxious and go into FIX mode. I would worry myself for days and nights trying to think of a way to not let someone be mad at me or disappointed in me. Looking back, I’m not sure if they were. My power is knowing that I can CHOOSE how to DEFINE my own self worth. Knowing I AM loved. Knowing I don’t need anyone’s approval to JUST BE ME, because DAMN, I’m pretty awesome just the way God made me. I must admit, I’m feeling pretty good these days but it was a long journey that took a lot of work.
In 2016 life changed yet again and brought my husband Ryan and motherhood. I had taken on a lot of expectations of being a wife and mother and that brought on a whole new level of stress. I was trying to always live up to these crazy expectations I had for myself.
Let me be super clear. My first year of motherhood, I was REALLY STRESSED OUT! I wanted to be perfect. I worried about sending my daughter to daycare. I spent hours making homemade baby food. I needed to get back in shape and workout/eat right. I needed to focus on my career. I needed to be a great step mom, wife and friend. If you could worry about it, then momma you better believe I did.
And you can probably guess what that all led me too? Having panic attacks over not having my daughters lunch made for school. Being snippy with my husband. Feeling like I was constantly RUNNING, being pulled in every direction and never giving anything 100%. And the last thing I had time for was me. I am not talking about time for a pedicure. I mean time for me to really think about me. What did I want? What makes me happy? What fills up my tank and allows me to give without losing my own sense of fulfillment? How on earth would I make the TIME to do those things for me?
When my daughter was 18 months old, I was sitting on the floor giving her a bath with my husband plopped up on the bathroom counter and was going on about not having anything for JUST ME. I was telling him about my best friend and how she had so many passions, yet I felt like I was living the same freaking day over and over again. How I felt like I didn’t have anything, FOR ME. From the outside it looked like I had it all, yet I felt like nothing was truly mine. See – that’s the thing. Trying to be perfect for everyone else, left me happy – but entirely empty. Does that sound like you too? Do you ever feel that way? To be really honest I even felt guilty for feeling that way. I have happy healthy children, a loving and supportive husband, and a wonderful career and life. Why on earth was that not enough?
WE, as women, are made for so much MORE, but only if we are truly whole from within first. Oh Mama, I feel you! But we have to be ENOUGH to ourselves first.
That’s when I realized that my gift, my passion and the THING that makes this mama, a better mama, is using my experiences, strengths, lessons and badass-ness to show other mama’s just like you that YOU have strength and power too. That you can HAVE it all without GOING absolutely insane.
There I was, SUPER excited! I found something I loved! I found my passion!
And I decided to GO FOR IT… and then two days before I left for training I found out I was pregnant…with TWINS. Que panic attack.
And more than ever I had to find a way to figure out how to have it all, without losing my mind, having panic attacks and without running around like a chicken with my head cut off all the time!
That’s when I made the choice and I went ALL in.
LIke you mama, I had a vision but was completely stressed with thinking how on earth I would find the time or “balance” in my life.
I had ZERO idea how I would make it all happen, but I made a choice that my dreams and passions were worth it too so I took the leap and went for it!
I found some great strategies that worked and friend, let me tell you, I found ones that I will NEVER do again.
I TOOK OWNERSHIP of MY HAPPINESS.
I QUIT SAYING THERE’S NO TIME.
I invested in a coach. I tried meditation. I focused on things that I loved, like reading and being in community. I joined an awesome network of like minded females that could help teach me how to start a business. I asked my husband for support. I started getting up at 5:30AM to workout.
I FINALLY MADE ME A PRIORITY.
I realized, as moms, we ALL may experience life differently, but the one thing I know is for sure, we all need support. We need judgment free RIDE OR DIE MOMMY friends that will LOVE us and CHALLENGE us. We need to be US. We need to be #1 and the leader of our own lives not just for our own benefit but for the benefit of everyone else in our lives too! .
I want my kids to experience my self worth so that they understand they are ENOUGH, as is.
My sweet mama friend- if you are overwhelmed, stressed and totally not “feeling like yourself.” You don’t have to give up. You don’t have to keep on barely making it through the day.
You CAN be a successful mama at work AND at home. You can be PRESENT with your family AND go with the flow. You CAN be FULLY you, without apologies and feeling torn in a thousand different directions.
My mission is to EMPOWER women just like you to LIVE out your passions. To create a life of success and happiness without sacrificing your values and yourself so you can show up in the world happier than ever and SHINE brightly for your family AND the world to see.
I am so thrilled about sharing my journey with you and helping you find your special groove that has you waking up ready to ROCK this LIFE! Are you ready to take back control and see just how powerful you? Let’s work together to create a life you love, with actionable strategies that make you feel LESS stressed for the long term?
Shine on mama,